I just wanted to check, because sometimes in sapphic spaces, I feel like I’m intruding. Sometimes it’s made explicitly clear that I’m not welcome, which can be quite hurtful if the event or community describes itself with terms I use for myself, such as “sapphic” or “wlw”. In this case though, this community is named “lesbians”, so I wouldn’t take it personally if y’all would prefer that bi women don’t post or comment here, I just want to be clear about expectations; I once had someone accuse me of cultural appropriation for having carabiners on my tool harness, so I’ve ended up becoming a tad hypervigilant about overstepping.

Regardless of what the answer to this post is, it might be worthwhile to put something in the community info

  • AnarchistArtificer@slrpnk.netOPEnglish
    4·
    12 days ago

    That’s a funny joke, but if I may use this to go on a wee tangent: I’ve actually found that in terms of dating, sometimes it feels like I might as well be a lesbian.

    On the surface, it might seem like a bi woman’s dating pool is gonna be mostly men, because there are far more straight men in the world than sapphic women, but that doesn’t account for the quality of the dating pool. For instance, it feels like a significant proportion of straight men say shit like how if not for my short hair, I might be pretty, or that it’s a shame that I’ve ruined myself with piercings.

    I’d say my attraction to men is roughly equal in magnitude to my attraction to women (though different qualitatively), but in practice, I seem to mostly date women because actually finding men who are chill with me being queer (and who don’t fetishize my sexuality) are much rarer than sapphic women. Not that I’m complaining necessarily, because women are great; I just find it interesting.