Be careful befriending the spirals. My ex and I befriended them one night in a tent in Zion National Park and neither of us could find my penis for some time and not just because it’s so small. We were physically patting around for it and I swear it was gone, it felt like it had spiraled down to my leg, but it wasn’t there either and I couldn’t stop looping into myself, so it was really like it was running from me.

They’ll getcha. That’s all I’m saying.